like she knew already knew her end
it’s so hard to find the silver lining right now. there’s nothing to surround myself with but everything that’s making this so hard to begin with. even when i get away, it follows me. i don’t want to talk about it out loud.
i’m so jealous. i wonder when things will finally work in my favour. i keep telling myself that it’s going to happen, that it must happen soon because how could it not? but it never happens. it actually just gets worse. how many times must i get up after being constantly knocked down? i’ve never wanted to quit something more than i do right now. i hate quitting. i wish people would feel sorry for me, but i know they won’t and i know i don’t deserve the sympathy.
i’m just waiting to get over this. i wish it was already over. i don’t know how i’m going to make it through to april… i really don’t.